Work was terrible. My male co-workers took forever to unload the truck, I was forced into my break early, my other female co-worker kept fucking disappearing the whole first half of the shift, and messing around and not really working at all, and then as the night went on, she made sure to be in the back as much as she possibly could, leaving me as the only person in charge of counter and drive thru, as she did all the shit she 1, should have done earlier, and 2, should be training me on more. She also thought it was priority to start filling a special order for the next day, when that's night shift's job, since their customer intake is slower. We had a bunch of shit left on our list by the shift change because she fucked off, and it pissed off the night guy, who told us to finish whatever task we were doing and "get the hell out".
I came home hot, sweaty, exhausted, and having only eaten a small cup of chicken noodle soup, and a bag of sliced apples all day, basically living off of the iced coffee with espresso I had on the way to work.
And then, I came to a dead betta fish. I'm such a shitty fucking pet owner, I don't understand how the fuck I think I'm going to be a decent mother at all one day. My fish always die, my guinea pig is always getting sick... I just feel useless and stupid and that I have no potential or purpose in the goals I have in mind, and its a really shitty way to feel.
To top it all off, it seems my plans (the ones I've been looking forward to all week, and what got me through tonight) of going to Secretary of State tomorrow morning, and hanging out all day with Jake and going to Outback for a nice dinner, are cancelled.
I'm really pissed off and annoyed and want to eat all the left over pizza we have, cry, and sleep.
Fuck it.
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